The beauty of Low expectations

I’ve got my kickboxing tournament on Sunday, and boy am I excited! I’ve been training hard the last 3 days, which totally makes up for the week long over-eating/drinking bonanza in Peru just prior. So I’m thinking I’m a shoe-in for first place. I did actually consider not washing my uniform for a week so as to utilize a special chemical/biological attack in the form of a clutch (grab their head and smother their face; in this case into my arm pit).
There would be no stopping me then.

But, I am a humanist and so I will do no such thing. I will instead rely upon my cunning, wit, and charm (ex: “You look very nice today”, then they will presumably experience some positive feelings towards me and not want to hit me as hard). If that doesn’t work I plan to kick a whole bunch. While more barbaric, it does have the desired effect during practice sparring matches.

But back to the title of this post: low expectations…my instructor regularly imparts wise teachings upon us as part of instructorship, one of which is this: “if you don’t think you can do something, then you are right, you can‘t. But if you believe you can, then you can.” Now, I see the point to this mantra, don’t get me wrong. But it got me thinking, because there are definitely situations in life in which having high expectations is self-defeating. I mean, I am pretty sure I’m not going to come in first in my division (I decided against the chemical/bio weapon, for one), so I’m definitely not going to be disappointed when I don’t win. If by some chance I actually do get into a good rhythm, land my punches/kicks and make my way through the ranks and do win, well then crap, I’m gonna be a hell of a lot more excited than I would be if I expected to win. Its like that US track gold medalist woman a couple years back who “only won 4 gold medals” and one silver. Seriously. Way to set yourself up for failure.

So I guess it’s a fine line between expectations vs confidence in abilities/belief in possibilities. For example: I don’t expect to win, but I know it is a possibility.

And just so I don’t sound like a complete self-defeating pessimist: there are over 1,800 people in this tournament. Which is why I can say pretty confidently that I am unlikely to win. Most of those people aren’t in my weight and belt division of course, but this is the biggest martial arts event in the nation, and its my first time. I’m doing it for the experience, for that warm fuzzy feeling I am sure to get in the stomach after accepting my first full power front kick to the gut.

I actually look forward to that. And it just now strikes me that that might be kinda weird.

I guess its sort of become a Fight Club type thing, where the injuries and pain are satisfying. Okay now that definitely sounds weird. Its not like I come away from class with black eyes and broken lips or anything. Just bruises and numerous aches. The feeling of satisfaction has something to do with knowing that the pain is from something worthwhile, something that I actually exerted myself in. Or something like that.

Hmm, I should probably take a writing class so that I can express these things more effectively and eloquently (looking at you again, Mom).

Anywho. I should go write something that I’ll get paid for.

Ta-ta for now